My Offerings
Individual Therapy
Whether you're sad, anxious, or grieving,
I care about your story and collaborate with my clients towards solutions that will empower and uplift.
I have experience working with clients of diverse backgrounds and especially enjoy working with those who are neuro-divergent and/or have trauma histories
Couples Therapy
Learn how to communicate your needs and emotions, repair relationship wounds, and improve connection. I love working with queer couples and have extensive experience working with open/polyamorous relationship structures, as well as monogamous relationships.
Sex Therapy
Talk openly about intimacy, sexuality, and the erotic without judgment or shame, address performance anxiety, navigate consent and boundaries, and improve physical intimacy.
I utilize a sex-positive, body-positive, and trauma-informed approach to sex therapy and am an ally to SWs and kinksters.
About ME
My name is Shelby Spake and I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and sex therapist in Oregon. My path to becoming a therapist has been a long and winding one. From bio-anthropology to nursing school and finally to pursuing an education in human psychology, I have always been drawn to understanding the human mind, our relationships, and how I can support others in addressing mental health and interpersonal concerns. I received my Master of Arts in Marriage, Couple, and Family Therapy with a specialization in sex therapy and graduated summa cum laude. Growing up in the Pacific Northwest, joys that have kept me rooted along the way have always been the lush nature surrounding us, my precious pets, and my supportive loved ones.
When I was 12 years old, I saw a therapist for the first time and remember thinking, “I would love to be there for people like my therapist is for me.” This memory has propelled me in my journey toward becoming a therapist. In addition, my identity as a neurodivergent queer woman and my experiences living with Complex PTSD have equipped me with a compassion toward human suffering and a drive to forge paths to healing with my clients. I always strive to lead with curiosity, empathy, and openness when working with all of my clients.
All of these reasons and more have led me to where I am now, always seeking to learn and grow in my profession as a marriage, couples, and family therapist and sex therapist. I have endless empathy for those who have been wounded in life (which are all of us) and who are taking the first, scariest steps of seeking out help and support. I believe most problems, solutions, and healing begin at home with the support of those around us. I aspire to provide socioculturally-sensitive support and guidance that builds upon evidenced-based approaches that encourage progress, trust in our therapeutic relationship, and each client’s inherent strengths.
When I'm not working, I love gardening, sci-fi and horror movies, and spending time with my loved ones and sweet pet companions.
My Approach
My therapeutic approach is deeply rooted in systems theory, narrative therapy, Gestalt, and emotion-focused therapy (EFT). I believe in the interconnectedness and mutual responsibility we have to each other, as well as to this earth. I aim to create a collaborative partnership where we explore your narrative with kindness and intention.
My personal style or energy as a therapist is honest, compassionate, and accepting, with a pinch of dark humor.
This business holds core values that are anti-racist & anti-fascist and will not tolerate hatred or harassment of any kind. Thank you.
01
Being Truly Heard
In our first sessions, I provide a calm space where you can share your story safely. We will move at your pace so you feel understood.
02
Exploring Your Patterns
Together, we will gently look at the habits and thoughts that shape your life. We notice how they serve you and where you might have outgrown them.
03
Making Gentle Changes
We focus on small, meaningful shifts that feel right for you. You will gain tools to build deeper connections and find more peace in your daily life.
Get in touch
Whether you have questions about the process or would like to schedule a free 15-minute consultation, I am here to listen. You are welcome to reach out whenever you feel ready.
“My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws, and to stop this incessant worrying that I can't be loved as I am."
— Anaïs Nin